I stumbled upon a quote by the American poet laureate Kay Ryan the other day:
The day misspent,
the love misplaced,
has inside it
the seed of redemption.
Nothing is exempt
… and it got me thinking about what I would do about days mis-spent and love misplaced.
We can’t go back and change the past, that’s a fact. But, if everything has a chance to be rescued or saved should you, or would you?
People talk about a mis-spent youth, generally in terms of not working harder, and by the time they realise this they haven’t gone as far as they actually wanted in life – some of the dreams are still the same distance away. But can you still shoot for those dreams, or do you risk ridicule?
I think dreams can be aimed for throughout life, at any age. After all what are we if we don’t have dreams and hopes – these are generally what keeps us going. Striving for something – which for many of us is unattainable, but we still keep trying, because trying and not reaching our destination is far better than not trying at all, isn’t it?
Mr Wrong No. 2 ridiculed me by saying that I was stupid to try to keep shooting for the stars – he said that there comes a point when you have to realise you will fail, and just give up on your dreams. Personally, I think he’s so totally wrong, and probably just goes to show what kind of person he really is.
I will never tell SC to give up on his dreams. I will stand behind him and help him reach for the stars, when he needs my help and encouragement, not scorn or jeer and generally put him down, so that he feels that he can never aim for anything, but just take whatever is handed out to him.
I still have my dreams, and yes, at 41, maybe they are unattainable, but I’ll never stop looking at the stars, striving, wishing and hoping.
So can you rescue mis-spent days and misplaced loves?
I think, if anything has a chance to be salvaged, you should at least try.
Maybe you spent a day playing instead of working hard on your business. Totally guilty of this sometimes – and yes, I know I have no one to blame but myself. But I salvage the situation and work long hours, over the weekend and am constantly striving to become a better “all-rounder” in the business world, so I can reach one of my stars.
Can we misplace love?
I think this could be open to two different meanings.
Firstly, by unwisely giving our heart to someone. This could be for many reasons – for me, when I left Mr Wrong No. 1 for Mr Wrong No. 2 it was because there was nothing left of my relationship with Mr Wrong No. 1, but Mr Wrong No. 2 came along at the right time, saying all the right things that I wanted to hear. Looking back, I was foolish, naive and too trusting – the only good thing to come out of it was SC, whom I wouldn’t be without for all the world. I’m sure everyone, at some point in their life has done the same thing.
Secondly, we can misplace love, if the timing, or situation, is not right for that love.
But can either of these be redeemed.
Personally, I would not wish to salvage anything from the disasters that were Mr Wrong Nos. 1 & 2. The only thing I have rescued is my sanity!
For the second, if I was lucky enough to be in the situation where there was a chance for happiness with someone, where previously there was not, I wouldn’t hesitate. I wouldn’t rush in though. I would want to take time and develop a deep friendship alongside love, to ensure that love would never be misplaced again. 😉